Stories from LA LA Land

So I've been bugging my best friend Liz to write this story out for about a week now, and it was definitely worth the wait:

'Take me to LA's hottest, most expensive restaurant,' my friend Kate from NYC demanded of me for her one night in town, so I took her to Foxtail around 9:30 on a magical Thursday night. For all you East-Coasters, Foxtail is a supper club/ night club brought to you by the famed party promoter Brent Bolthouse of "The Hills" fame and Sam Nazarian, the brains behind Hyde, Area, and other LA nightlife giants. About thirty seconds into dinner, I noticed Ryan Phillipe sitting two tables away in the uncomfortably small restaurant. How was the food? I have no idea, I was too busy trying to make eyes at Ryan Phillipe, downing a bottle of Prosecco, and pretending to listen to my friend chatter. Our plans were to stay at Foxtail after dinner and make our way into the night club area. Done eating, we stepped out for a cigarette and were immediately bombarded by the papparazzi. Somehow, by complete chance, we had stumbled onto Nicole Richie's birthday party, which was taking place that night in the nightclub area of Foxtail. It was insane! There were at least 40 paparazzos standing there, waiting, hungry for some money shots. There was even a little 7 year-old paparazzo with a disposable camera, I'm sure tagging along with her Papa-razzi (true anecdote; pun intended.) At this point, Britney Spears came in. Then Nicky Hilton. (You can see the back of my head around second 48 of the pap video. I am legend.) Then Janet Jackson and Jermaine Durpre. Then Paris Hilton and Benji Madden. Then Lisa Kudrow (really? seriously?). After the brouhaha died down, Kate and I proceeded to walk back in, but were immediately stopped at the door. "It's a closed party." We had stepped out for 20 minutes, tops, but they refused to let us back in. After some wheeling and dealing which I will not bore you with, Kate and I finally made our way to the party. (But just know-- getting in was NOT easy. In all seriousness, its probably the most difficult thing I've ever done). Anyway. In a 20 x 20 room with approximately 15 of the most famous young celebrities in Hollywood- here are my observations:+/-

1. Paris Hilton and Benji Madden seem very much in love. They were all over each other and I don't think it's just for show. I think he is actually crazy about her. This is most likely due to the fact that he is really ugly in real life, and she is fairly nice looking. 2. I heard Amanda Bynes scream out, "Suck my titties" while telling a story to her entourage. I want to be her friend. 3. No one (except us) was really drunk. 4. Adrian Grenier is really hot. Which brings me to the crux of my night.... 1:45 a.m., and I am many drinks deep. Suddenly, the crowd clears from around Adrian Grenier, and I carpe diem. I walk up to him and start grinding up against him Night at the Roxbury style. We dance for a little and then I walk away, playing coy. A little while later, he comes up to me and Kate, and stands there, watching us dance. I decided to wait and let him make the move, play it cool- it pretty much always works. 5. Playing it cool with celebrities does NOT work. While waiting for him to approach me, two girls pounced on him like starving Vietnamese tigers. Within 5 minutes, Adrian Grenier was leaving Foxtail (and dashing my dreams) with a girl on each arm. Even though, I didn't end up canoodling with Adrian Grenier, that night I broke up with my boyfriend. Dancing with Adrian Grenier made me feel like I could do better. I know, it sounds like a pretty terrible way to end the night, but really there is a happy ending! A week later, I ran into Adrian Grenier. He remembered me, and we've been dating ever since. We have planted a tomato garden together, and he's brought up marriage! ...Actually thats not true. The next day I woke up boyfriend-less, hungover, and $ 200 poorer. 4 days later, I was groveling to my boyfriend to get back together. In the end though, it was the most ridiculous and fun night I've had in a long time. Happy Birthday Nicole Richie!